More than 99% of people are unprepared for their resurrection.
Are you?
Are you?
Undeath Coverage
All our lives we rely on insurance to protect ourselves and those we love: Car Insurance, Life Insurance, Renter's Insurance, ...But what happens if you return from the dead?
One-time payment
as low as $14.99!
as low as $14.99!
How Undeath Coverage Works
Purchase
Sign up for one of our policies for a one-time payment starting at just$14.99
Death
The insured passes away do to any reason.Resurrection
The insured returns from the dead for any reason other than exacting revenge.Minimum duration of death required.
Benefits
Collect benefits as outlined in your Undeath Coverage.
More than one reason
to purchase Undeath Coverage!
Picture yourself as a Zombie!
Green skin and a weird smell, much like the hamburgers from the cafeteria. You don't really feel any different, except that strange craving for brains. But where will the brains you desire come from? Sure, you could risk your newly acquired status to snag some of them on the way to Kohl's, but that would surely get law enforcement involved.But that's when it hits you. You may be wearing half of a fancy suit, but your wallet is long gone. So is your ID and the $30 in Kohl's Cash you had in your account probably expired, too.
And what the heck happened to your left foot?
It's Not Just Zombies
Some of our policy holders have returned as other soulless creatures like Ghouls, Wraiths, and even famous Hollywood actors!Are you ready to go this path by yourself? Do you know what you should do if you suddenly find yourself able to phase through walls?
Of course not! That's why EternalCoverage pretends to employ scores of experts! We have a full stable of lawyers, attorneys, advocates, and legal advisors. But even better! We also have an office cat that is not afraid of the undead.
Don't delay!
Purchase Undeath Coverage today!
Sure, your friends may laugh at you, but for a single, small payment you can
settle peacefully into your coffin known that we have you covered no matter
what!
Find The Policy That's Right For You!
Worried about yourself? A loved one? Your high school bully?EternalCoverage makes it easy to purchase a policy for anyone in your life. All you need is their name, email address, and shoe size.
Yourself
A solid choice. Nobody wants to return from the dead only find their partner in the arms of their new lover curled up in front of the fireplace. All that while standing outside in the rain, broke, tired, and without a bean and cheese burrito.Buy Today!
A Loved One
The vows said "until death do us part". So it's your choice if you want to buy insurance to cover them! Show your love with this important investment!Buy Today!
Anyone Else
Worried about the cute girl at the copy shop? That's a little creepy, but who are we to judge?We recommend you buy our cheapest policy, put the PDF on a USB drive and waddle down there. She will be as surprised as your mom was that one day she cleaned your room. You were about 12. Remember? Pepper Rage Farms sure does...
Buy Today!
Still not convinced?
Not only are we the only current issuer of Undeath Coverage, but we are also the most reliable and cheapest choice! Remember the elections where you have to choose between the lesser of two evils? You don't have to make this choice when it comes to protecting your afterlife!Make the right choice today!
Do you really want to spend the rest of your life wondering about what is next?
Only our amazing policies can give you the peace of mind you truly deserve. No matter if you are looking to ensure you have a place to live after you return or simply worry why we here at EternalCoverage keep talking about left feet so much, there is a policy for you!Cost
No other undeath policy is cheaper or more useful!Flexibility
Our policies cover you no matter where you are or the circumstances of your death and resurrection!Summoned by an evil witch? Covered!
Government used your body for experiments? Covered!
Returning for petty revenge? Covered!
No Exceptions! For a full list of exceptions please see your policy
Convenience
Purchase your policy with a one-time payment!No monthly subscription costs like your streaming services! No need to update credit cards or addresses as you move.
Refer A Friend!
Many of our customers expect their resurrection to be permanent, which causes the next problem: If you become a Ghost that nobody else can see, how will you make friends? Their looks and bodies will pass right through you. Half of our staff considers the thought of your mom passing through their aura kinda sexy but to me it sounds pretty lonely.So why not refer us to some of your friends? That way they too have a chance to enjoy the afterlife rather than be forced to roam the lands, scavenging on rats and raccoons.
Refer!